Having a good friend is a precious privilege, and you can be a good friend only when you are abiding in Christ. Only he can enable you to love others selflessly as he loves you.
Hi, I’m Joni Eareckson Tada and I sure do treasure my friendships.
What would I do without friends?! As a quadriplegic who can’t use her hands or legs, I’d be nothing without friends! It’s one reason I named it Joni and Friends. People with disabilities like me understand the privilege, the preciousness of having a good friend. It’s precious because I see each friend as a gift from God. And these friendships are not merely a way of getting my needs met – you know, someone to help me get up, get out of bed, help me get dressed – no, it’s not about my needs. I see these people as individuals that God has placed in my life to help meet their needs: to pray for them; to cheer them on; to be interested in them; to serve them as best I can.
And I hope you look at your friends that way. Actually, if you know Christ as your Lord and Savior, I’m certain you see your friends as people in whom you can invest your love and prayers. Because loving people well comes from an overflow of loving Jesus well. It all starts with God. Before you can be a good friend to someone in need, you must be in an abiding relationship with Christ, ’cause he’s the one who helps you love others as he loved you. Unconditional love like that may be rare in our self-centered world, but it should be the hallmark, the distinct quality of believers in Christ. Pastor and biblical counselor Garrett Higbee writes in his booklet “Helping a Hurting Friend” that, “finding good friends is less about finding the ideal person to connect with and more about being ready to be that person to someone else. To find a good friend, you first need to be a good friend.”
I love Pastor Garrett’s little booklet because in it he has this quiz, this assessment of how to know whether or not you are being a good friend. And it’s really fascinating, it’s so revealing. So, let me read from “Helping a Hurting Friend” so you can take this little test right now. See how many of these statements are true about you, okay? Okay, the first: do I think the best of my friends? Or are you quick to judge and assume the worst about them? Next, do you feel the pain and disappointment of your friends and want to encourage them? That’s a good one, because sometimes when people express their pain, we start talking about our own pain, as if that’s a way of showing that we identify. Okay, here’s another: “I love my friends enough to have a hard conversation, if needed.” Wow. How many of us do that, right? Often, we’re afraid to offend the other for fear of losing their friendship, and so we never get around to having those hard conversations that confront. Here’s another question. Do you point your friends to Christ and his Word when trouble strikes? Do you pray with and pray for your friends regularly? Are you confidential with sensitive information about your friend? Do you love your friends even when they disappoint you or hurt you?
Now, there are more questions in this friendship assessment, but I just wanted you to get a feel for what this little booklet’s all about and how it can help deepen your own friendships. I know it sure has helped me. So, ask for your free copy of Garrett Higbee’s booklet “How to Help a Hurting Friend.” Just go to joniradio.org and ask for your gift. And remember, “To find a good friend, you first need to be a good friend.” That is great advice. So today, ask for your booklet on friendship at joniradio.org. Again, that’s joniradio.org for Garrett Higbee’s little booklet “How to Help a Hurting Friend.” Go today to joniradio.org.
© Joni and Friends