Hi, I'm Joni Eareckson Tada and welcome to "Joni and Friends".
I was reading I Peter chapter 3 the other day, the part about how we women shouldn’t put so much focus on the braiding of hair, or the wearing of gold, or the putting on of fine clothing… external things. And it got me to thinking: But we women tend to do just that, don’t we! When I see a friend at work in a new outfit, I'll give a compliment. Or maybe it’s “Hey, I really like the way you did your hair today” or “Oh, my goodness those shoes! I love those cute little shoes; where did you find them?” or "Did you see Katherine’s nails today? Her nail lady painted the neatest little flowers on them. " I know people do it with me – the way my hair looks now since I lost my old hair in chemotherapy from breast cancer. “Why Joni,” they say, “you look 10 years younger!” I enjoy that… it makes you feel good to know that people like the way you do your hair or dress for the day.
No, these things aren’t bad, but it is true that (like I Peter chapter 3 says), these things easily become the focus, don’t they. We may not realize it, but we help people be shallow when we focus our compliments only on the external things. But the point of I Peter chapter 3 is to help us pay attention to patterns of good character that emerge from what God is doing on the inside of a person. How much more encouraging it is to hear someone say, “Hey, Joni, you know I heard you handle that problem on the phone with such grace; good for you!” Or “The thing I like about you is your upbeat attitude; you really have a can-do spirit and I admire that.” I can speak personally here – my secretary Francie, for instance, really dresses great; all the way down to those cute little polka-dot nylons she wears with her open-toe heels. There’s hardly a day she comes to work that she doesn’t look ready for a magazine photo shoot. And I tell her that she looks great. But I also make a point to tell her how much I appreciate the Christ-like qualities I see God building in her life. I mean, she is extremely patient and very flexible and I tell her that often, thanking her for her helpful spirit and great attitude at work. I say that often, “Francie, with all I throw at you at this desk, you have a great attitude!”
There are dozens of ways that you can spot the image of God in another. So may I encourage you today to look for godly things to commend in your family or neighbors or coworkers or people at church? I'm not talking about flattery or manipulating others with compliments in order to get your way, or in order to look good in their eyes… I'm talking about First Corinthians 14:12 where it says that we should “try to excel in things that build up other believers.” Excel in being an encourager. Because when you affirm a Christ-like characteristic in someone, you are pointing to something very valuable; you are basically saying: “I see Jesus in you and I value that. Keep it up; keep living that way, because that wonderful quality is something God is doing in your life, and He’s to be praised for it!” Pointing to Christ-like character qualities in a person is a way of praising God by commending His attributes in their lives. And when you value a character quality in a friend or family member – like flexibility, or patience or generosity – you are attributing honor to the very source of those qualities. And that is God Himself.
So today, friend, look past the external in others, and focus on what God is doing inside their lives. Affirm where you see Jesus in the actions and attitudes of the people you encounter – it’s a wonderful way to honor I Corinthians 14, because you’ll not only be building up others, you’ll be glorifying Jesus.
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