Your suffering can and does benefit others, and that is the more necessary thing than relief. The way you handle suffering has a profound impact on those around you.
Ever wonder why people live past their ripe old age?
Well, hi, I’m Joni Eareckson Tada, and I’m thinking of my own grandmother. She was born in Germany and in the early 1900s, she was brought to America as an orphan to be adopted. Thankfully, early on, she was brought into the fold of another German family and grew up with strong family values. Minafred Landwher eventually married, raised seven children, one of whom was my mother. Although Grandmother Landwher was firm-handed, she was fair in her dealings with us, her grandchildren, and we grew to love her easily. When I was a little girl, man, I loved helping my mother clean Grandmom’s house. And it was Grandmother who taught me how to scrub floors with a stiff bristle brush, and a rag, and a bucket of hot, soapy water, on your knees.
My grandmother lived to be a ripe old age – so old, in fact, that as a teenager I wondered why God allowed her to linger on in so much suffering. She had to leave her cherished home to come live with us. My sister, Jay, moved out of her bedroom and in with Kathy and me. My siblings and I ran errands, read to Grandmother, and took on extra chores so that my mom would be free to tend to all the extra needs around the house. Grandmother Landwehr really changed our family dynamics; my sisters and I – all of us in our teens at the time – well, we became a lot less self-focused. As my Lutheran grandmother lay in bed, I’m sure she thought of Philippians 1 where Paul says, “I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far.” Oh, and who would’ve blamed her, given all the pain that she was in?
But hold on: there’s the rest of Philippians, where it says, “I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but” – I love that “but” – “[it’s] more necessary for you that I remain.” So, right there is why, I think, my grandmother lingered on so long. It was more necessary for us – my sisters and I – that she remain, because sometimes our suffering is mostly for the benefit of others. And I’m going to say that again, because, I don’t know, you might have an elderly family member living with you. And sometimes all the suffering – all the disappointment, pain, and inconvenience that goes with it – our suffering is often for the benefit of others. You see, God did not “take my grandmother home” before he used her to teach her grandchildren how to serve selflessly, how to focus on other people’s needs, rather than our own. Now, you may ask, “Oh, come on, was God only ‘using’ my grandmother’s hardship for our benefit?” Hardly! ’Cause Paul explains later, starting with verse 25, “Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith” – that’s the key – “so that through my being with you again your boasting in Christ Jesus will abound on account of me.” You see, as my sisters and I flexed our schedules and spent time by Grandmother’s bedside, washing her bedclothes, helping her in and out of her wheelchair, preparing her food, cleaning her dishes, we learned to serve like Jesus, and it was all for our progress and joy in the faith. God accomplished much in my life through Grandmom, and it’ll be all credited to her account. Wow!
And so, your hope today in hardship is to understand that your suffering can – and does – benefit others. And, oh, like Philippians says, may you see that as the more necessary thing even when – or rather, especially when – it’s inconvenient and hard. God bless you today, and thanks for listening.
© Joni and Friends