Hi, I’m Joni Eareckson Tada with a comforting word.
That’s right, because when it comes to complaining we need to be convicted. I'm thinking of what happened between my friend Dennis and his sister, Joyce. Dennis is a quadriplegic in a wheelchair like me. I've known him for years and this guy—oh, my goodness—is constantly battling pressure sores and infections, but I don't think I've ever heard the guy complain. He's got a great spirit! Dennis also has a very wry sense of humor.
His sister Joyce has rheumatoid arthritis. And, as Dennis puts it, Joyce will sometimes come over for a visit and vent about her chronic pain. Dennis assures her that it's okay to express her feelings. But every once in a while, when he just wants to lighten things up a bit and give his sister a hard time ... Dennis, sitting there paralyzed in his very big wheelchair, not able to use his hands or legs, he'll say “Oh, Joyce, tell me how much pain are you in? How it hurts to walk across the room; tell me Joyce how l-o-n-g it takes for you to get dressed, clean the house, go food shopping and put away the groceries.” “Tell me how it feels to take s-o long to do all these things; I really, really, really want to know how it feels (exaggerating his concern as much as possible).”
Soon, he’s got his sister absolutely grinning. Then, she will start laughing, pick up the nearest pillow, and throw it at her brother and say, "Oh, Dennis, be quiet. I can't even come over here to complain!" That's when they both start belly laughing—why? Well, for a few minutes there, Joyce has a different perspective on her pain—standing there next to her paralyzed brother—and she's able to forget about it, at least for a while.
And I think that story teaches a lesson, really it does ... because when we make suffering the main object, it's impossible not to succumb to overwhelming feelings of despair. It happens when we make our problems and pain the focus, rather than God and others. And those who suffer greater problems, like Dennis, can have a healthy influence on those who suffer fewer problems. Now, please, I'm not diminishing the pain that Joyce goes through every day, but I am saying that it can help—really help—when we see others hold on to God's grace in the midst of their biggest problems. For Joyce, her brother Dennis is a tangible reminder that she can do the same.
Complaining has become an epidemic for many of us. And what does the Bible say about it? Listen to these verses from the book of Jude.
"See, the Lord is coming with thousands upon thousands of his holy ones to judge everyone, and to convict all the ungodly of all the ungodly acts they have done in the ungodly way, and of all the harsh words ungodly sinners have spoken against him."
These men are—what are they? Drug pushers? Mass murderers? Pedophiles? No. It goes on to say, these men are “grumblers.” Yikes. Oh, friend, for the Christian there is absolutely no room for grumbling or complaining. And to help you with that, to help you cultivate a spirit of gratitude, I would like to send you a beautiful laminated pamphlet I wrote recently called, "A Thankful Heart In a World of Hurt." It's a 14-page foldout with great insights about gratitude—something that you can read from around your Thanksgiving table next month. Just go to my radio page at Joniandfriends.org and ask for your copy of "A Thankful Heart in a World of Hurt." Tell your friends about it; just click the Facebook share button at the bottom of my radio page. Because complaining should never have the final say. Just ask my friend Dennis and, yes, his grateful, very grateful sister, Joyce.
© Joni and Friends
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