My missionary-friend Gesina Blaauw once told me a most remarkable story. She’s a Dutch missionary and she described the time when, many years ago, she was thrown into a communist prison in Yugoslavia – it was because the authorities caught her with Bibles and Christian literature in the trunk of her car. Those authorities wasted no time; immediately she was thrown into jail.
Gesina said it was horrible. Her jail cell was pitch black. She couldn’t see a thing. And there was a sickening stench in that small little cell, with filth and trash on the floor that she couldn’t even see. In the dark, she felt the safest thing to do was to lean against a wall. That’s when suddenly, standing there in pitch blackness up against the wall, Gesina remembered a verse of Scripture she had read right before she was thrown into prison. It was Psalm 80:5 “You have fed them with the bread of tears.”
Gesina didn’t at first understand why in the world God would bring that Scripture to mind—it wasn’t particularly comforting in her present circumstances! She pushed the irrelevant verse out of her mind, and concentrated on more important things, like when they would let her out of jail. She felt frightened and overwhelmed; she had no idea if her missionary friends would realize what had happened to her. Just then, the jailer opened the small food door. She was so grateful for a shaft of light. But it didn’t last long – the jailer quickly shoved a stick of salami and a chunk of bread through the little door, then slammed it shut.
She was left – right there in the pitch dark again – left alone to eat the salami and the bread. Frustrated that she couldn’t even set the salami down on the dirty floor in order to tear off a piece of bread, Gesina felt like she had enough and she began to cry. Without thinking, she wiped her tears with the chunk of bread in her other hand. That’s when it happened. Suddenly Psalm 80:5 flashed before her. The verse she had read the morning before, where it says, “God has fed them with the bread of tears.” She laughed out loud. God knew! He hadn’t forgotten her! She could eat her tear-soaked bread knowing that he had specifically given it to her. She didn’t mind being fed the bread of tears if she could only be convinced it had come straight from his hand – and oh, it had! She had another reason for being encouraged. The next day her missionary friends arrived and she was released from jail.
Gesina has gone on to have a marvelous ministry among the disabled in Albania. And to the end of her days, she will remember how—in the worst and darkest of circumstances—God came near and reminded her of his constant presence and care. And he did it when he fed her the bread of tears.
So, friend, today, whatever your circumstances, difficult as they may be, remember: God knows precisely where you are and how to care for you. Look for your own bread of tears… No matter how dark and discouraging your situation may be.
Used by permission of
JONI AND FRIENDS
P.O. Box 3333
Agoura Hills, CA 93176
© Joni and Friends